[Mending Years, 2023.06.28-07.12, Gallery L0, JCCAC] The recollections of family members are too fragmentary for Winsome Wong to piece together wholesome understanding of her father, grandparents and the times they struggled through in the 1960s-80s, when she was not yet born. She turned the blank spaces into a journey of research and conversations, and the quest for photographic truths. 出生於祖父母和父輩掙扎成長之後的黃慧心，無法從他們口中得知1960-80年代的他們和香港的實際存在。如何填補這個空白？於是她先由他們以前工作的地方開始，然後透過與爺爺翻看在他和嫲嫲家中家庭照片…。感謝照片和照相機的存在。
照片的空白 Blanks in the Pictures
Synopsis 本事
小時候一家人和爺爺嫲嫲住在鑽石山，爺爺總是把頭髮梳得整齊企理的，穿著西褲恤衫去位於新蒲崗工廠大廈的理髮店工作。由於嫲嫲中過風，我小時候她已經行動不便，加上她和家人都甚少提起她有關工作的事情，所以我好像理所當然的覺得她一直以來都是家庭主婦。直到近來問到，才知道她曾經也在工廠打過工，也帶過膠花等回家穿。我驚訝的是嫲嫲常常跟我說話，甚至重複著某些故事，但我卻從來不知道她這個過往，而父親和爺爺對於她工作的過往大概只能描述工作性質、工作地點以及為何轉了工作等。幾年前嫲嫲過身了，而這段過往也某程度上留了一點空白。至於現在九十多歲的爺爺，即使已經退休多年，依舊把頭髮梳得整齊企理，也會穿西褲恤衫，好像依舊留著他曾經的專業的痕跡；即使他聽力退化，我還可以跟他聊天。
我不太知道可以如何填補這個關於嫲嫲的過往的空白。父親和爺爺能夠描述得最清楚的好像就是她工作的地方 – 位於鳳凰村、慈雲山、新蒲崗那一帶，好像離我成長的地方很近卻對我來說有點陌生。於是我想先由走一遍有關爺爺嫲嫲以前工作的地方開始，然後透過與爺爺翻看在他和嫲嫲家中的家庭照片，看看還可以填補甚麼關於他們的空白，而無可避免的空白又是甚麼。
When I was a kid, my family lived in Diamond Hill with my grandparents. Grandpa would always comb his hair neat and nice, and would wear shirts and trousers to work in the barber shop located in San Po Kong. Ever since my grandma had a stroke, her physical mobility was limited. And as she and our family seldom mention anything about her work, I seemed to have taken it for granted that she had always been a housewife. It wasn't until I asked recently that I found out that she had actually worked in factories and had brought plastic flowers to assemble at home. I was surprised that I never knew about this piece of her past even though my grandma often talked to me. Meanwhile, my father and grandpa could only describe the nature of her work, why she changed jobs, where she worked and so on without a lot of details. Grandma passed away a few years ago, leaving behind a certain void in her past. On the contrary, grandpa, now in his nineties and retired for many years, still combs his hair neatly and wears trousers and shirts, as if he’s still keeping every trace of his profession. And even though he hears less well now, I could still chat with him.
I’m not sure how to fill in the void about my grandma's past, but my father and grandpa are the most clear when it comes to the locations where grandma worked - Fung Wong New Village, Tsz Wan Shan, San Po Kong and more – all near where I grew up yet seem unfamiliar to me. Thus, I would start by going through the places where my grandparents used to work, and then look through the family photos at my grandparents' house with my grandpa to see what else I can fill in regarding the void about them, and meanwhile what is the inevitable void lying there.
My thoughts while installing this work and afterwards… 佈展和展出後的回顧
自以為熟悉嫲嫲，但她離開了以後剩下的空缺只能透過還在的人的記憶填補，在世時的記憶慢慢偏差，有些空白透過誰的記憶也填補不了。但反覆看著照片不同時期的神情，存在本身，又彷彿填補了語言所不能表達的。這些她在世時常常翻看的照片，離世後沒什麼人再翻看，我也後悔沒有再早點去看她在看什麼，那樣我們的話題可能可以更多。
一路看着照片一路對家中第一個買相機的伯父心存感激，因為這樣才留下了他們那時的模樣，又透過被拍攝的人的模樣去想像他是怎樣的人。
在桌上放了父親的文章，叫了很久沒有再執筆而寡言的父親寫下有關那段時期的記憶（因為口頭溝通好像問不出什麼來），兒時常常期待在他被刊登的投稿又或草稿中看到自己，長大後沒想到原來可以再次透過文字進入他的世界、他眼中的大人的模樣，那些祖父母不會提及的過去，也好像因此更明白了他現在的模樣。
在這段時期有再夢見嫲嫲，很珍惜每次能這樣再次見面，但又要再一次經驗離別。最後覺得能夠看見她曾經的笑容是很幸福的。
I thought I knew my Grandma well. But since she departed, I was only able to fill in the many blanks in my memory through what her survivors could recall. Bit by bit as she became older, Grandma’s own recollection of memory became likely deviations. Some blanks are simply permanent absences, not to be filled by anyone’s memory. But as I repeatedly finger through photos that show her looks and expressions from different periods of her life, her very presence returns to seem to make up what words cannot express. These are also photos she used to finger through, but left untouched after she passed away. I also regret how I have failed to pay attention to what she was looking at, which could have struck many more conversations between us.
As I look at these photos one by one, I feel truly grateful to my uncle who was the first person to get their family a camera, which was why many of their looks had been preserved. Meanwhile, through the looks of the subjects in the photos taken by him, I could also imagine what kind of a person he was.
I have placed a piece of my father’s writing on a desk in the show. Not writing for many years, he agreed to write about what he recalled of the period [1960s-70s] (after some not so successful attempt of mine to ask him to recall verbally). When I was a kid, I often wished to find myself in his published or draft writings; never have I thought, as an adult, that I would be able to enter his world again through his writings. Indeed, he’s brought to life what the adults were like when he was a kid, and those pasts that my grandparents never mentioned, and I seem to have gained a better understanding of how Father got to become the person that I now know.
I have dreamt about Grandma these days, and cherish each meeting of this kind. Yet every “meeting” is marked by the experience of another farewell. After all, I consider it great blissfulness to be able to see the smile she had.
Background to the making of Blanks in the Pictures 《照片的空白》的創作背景及緣由
透過裝置和錄像的結合,嘗試重組嫲嫲那一代在60-70年代慈雲山新蒲崗那一帶曾經做過的工業兼職,例如穿膠花。嫲嫲幾年前過身,即使她常常跟我説不同的舊事,但後來才從不同人口中，例如不太健談的父親,知道她的另一些甚少向我提及的往事,也許以前鄉下的經歷比起在香港穩定而又辛勞當主婦兼職打工的往事更鮮明。透過這次的作品,我想透過父親,叔叔,爺爺那些可能各有版本對嫲嫲的記憶,以及資料搜集,重新去走我經常走過的地方,而她曾經在她的歷史中走過的路,去想像拼湊她曾經的生活,去想像她曾經如何勞動以一雙手做一些物件去幫補家計。裝置由三個部份組成：（一）祖父母1960-1980年代的足跡的地圖；（二）家庭照片的重組；（三）我和祖母對話的錄像。
1) Map about the mobility of my grandparents in 1960s-1980s
My grandmother seldom talks about her memory as part time factory labor, only after she passed away that I knew about it even though we do talk a lot before she passed away. From what my father and grandfather said, she didn’t work for a long time since some factories moved away from the neighborhood. And that my grandfather and grandmother preferred that she could stay home to look after the children. Since in the neighborhood of Tsz Wan Shan, there are a lot of drug related issues and crime. Meanwhile, my father and grandfather mentioned that she has worked in small scale family-run factories around San Po Kong and Fung Wong Estate, which is near their home in the public housing estate in Tsz Wan Shan at that time. On the other hand, my grandfather has worked as a barber for a long time, he has worked in places like Shek Kip Mei, Sham Shui Po, Wan Chai, and San Po Kong. When I was still a kid, I still remember that he works in an old building in San Po Kong.
This part would work as a brief introduction to people of the spaces my grandparents would walk pass, and how these places are no longer there with urban development, through a visual map combining graphics and photos.
2) A reorganization of family portraits
Even though my grandfather is already 94 years old, he still has a very neat hairstyle and always wears shirts and trousers. When going through the family portraits since 1950s (when my grandparents are still in China), I realized that my grandfather has always been dressing in this western way with similar neat hairstyle, while my grandmother always wears the chinese style flowery shirts. I would like to reorganize their photos showing the difference in their style of dressing until the times that I grew up and took portraits for them, this difference still remains. My grandfather said as a barber, he has to have decent suit and shirt at the workplace in order not to be looked down at. I guess this is where his habit of hairstyle and dressing up came from. This would also be a continuation of a work I made in 2018, which is about the portrait of my grandparents. On the other hand, my grandfather is the one who cuts my father and his two brothers hair, and his profession could be seen in their student photos, so their photos would also be included. He also but my brother’s hair and my hair too.
3) A video of my conversations with my grandmother
In a previous video work of mine made in 2016 and modified in 2019, I’ve combined different conversations with my grandmother, where these conversations could be tedious, my grandmother’s thoughts and what she values when she recall memories could be seen.The audio is mainly composed of my grandmother’s voice while the visual is my grandfather doing housework at the kitchen and toilet. I think somehow this summarized the difference in their mobility, as my grandmother is paralyzed, my grandfather is always the one who goes around while my grandmother is always the storyteller. But now my grandmother has passed away for more than 4 years, my grandfather has started to talk a bit more while his mobility isn’t as flexible as before.
link: https://youtu.be/eqa-TQRzUZQ
About the Artist 有關創作人
黃慧心專注於錄像書寫和影像的雕塑，透過帶著相機遊走，她譜寫和雕刻影像的質感和節奏。她相信藝術能讓她理解並步入生活。因此，她大部分作品都與她的日常生活和周遭的人有關，而她的作品亦受其流動性影響而在不同的文化背景下創作，如柬埔寨，越南，菲律賓和香港等。她花很多時間思考影像和藝術創作背後的權力議題，有時她讓身邊的人成為創作原料的提供者，而她是作品的「媒介」或「共同創作者」。她是藝術群體「據點。句點」成員。
WINSOME WONG mainly works on videography and the sculpting of images. Through moving along with her camera, composing and sculpting the texture and rhythm of images, she believes that art helps guiding her to step into daily life to make better sense of it. Most of her works are, therefore, draw from her daily life and people around her, turning her works into documented and re-invented evidence of her mobility against different cultural contexts, from Cambodia, Vietnam and the Philippines to Hong Kong. She also devotes herself to contemplate the legitimacy of images and her artworks and where the authority lies: to her it is obvious that she feels obliged to credit the sources of her works to people around her. Is she just an “agent” or “co-creator” of the works? She is a member of the Floating Projects Collective.
